How to use a Bidet.....

First,

I must confess....

I did not write the instructions.

AND

I have absolutely no experience with a bidet.

BUT

I know someone....

Her name is Nada,

she leads clumsy Americans on tours of Italy.

She is a saint.
(and pretty too!)

I came to know Nada over 10 years ago,

when she offered free,

that's right FREE

conversational Italian classes

(now get this...)

at a Gelato store!

Well,

that sold me....

FREE and cold creamy goodness!

Anywho...

I have followed Nada's rise to tour guide supreme

over the years and today on her 

FB page she enlightened me....

Instructions for a bidet!

So here goes;

The Five Lessons of the "Bidet" for Americans:

Lesson 1. The Bidet is for both men and women. Believe it, Italian men love it as much as women do.
Lesson 2. The Bidet is a time-saver. Think about it, you are ready to leave the house but..wait! You have a moment... So do you take a shower and start all over now? That's why we have a bidet.
Lesson 3. Always sit down on the Bidet facing the faucet (it would be hard to operate the hot/cold water knobs otherwise).
Lesson 4. The Bidet is multi-functional. Sit on the covered toilet or a stool and you can also use it to soak your feet after a long day.
Lesson 5. Don't be afraid of the Bidet, it cannot harm you. Try it!

smiles....

FREE stuff.....

Springtime!

Flowers bloomin',

Trees bustin' out all over....

Pollen tickling my sinuses.....

and

of course,

"April showers".....

the first week of March....

BIG storms were predicted for our area yesterday....

Clouds loomed heavy all morning....

I scurried around trying to accomplish all sorts of things before the

onslaught of rain, hail, lightening, thunder...

Well,

you get the picture.

And, as I rounded the bend in the parking lot in our community,

my peripheral vision caught something 

on the curb, surrounded by trash cans.....

(they call them buckets now don't they?)

on it's side, as if thrown by someone disgusted...

was a lid to a old wooden shipping chest.

You know the type, rounded top, with splats

of wood securing the top.

So,

(and by now, you are aware that the FREE stuff is for me...sorry)

I did what any mother of 3 college aged boys does...

parked my car, and non-chalantly,

(or more precisely, as slowly as I could manage)

 strolled over to have myself a "look-see".

Not only did I find a dirty, but perfectly intact,

lid/top but I found the bottom too!

AND

I saw that underneath this discarded trunk

was a piece of furniture,

in pieces....

So,

I picked up the trunk, placed the top on the bottom,

put them off to the side,

and tried to assemble the 

"parts".....

much to my surprise (and delight)

when things started to come together,

I had found a discarded

mirrored vanity.

Realizing that there would be no way for me to carry this discovery home,

I carried the trunk, which fortunately did not stink,

back to my house, and fired up the FIT,

put the back seat in the full and upright position

and drove over to pick up my 

treasure!

Getting this FREE stuff inside was made much easier 

by the fact that it was in numerous pieces,

each of which was manageable...

I had, and have no real idea where these things will ultimately 

land, so I brought them just inside the front door....

What do you think?

Pretty good for the amateur picker...

The wallpaper that is inside is old and peeling (obviously)

and I think I will be able to easily remedy that...

The painting on the floor is simply waiting for the vanity to 

get itself out of the way, so it can be re-hung.

Amazingly,

the mirror is intact, beveled, and apparently

custom made since it is uneven, oddly shaped....

The drawers were really very clean, and only need a bit 

of furniture polish to make them shine...

As you can see from some of the photos,

the top has some water damage and that 

is probably the reason for the trash day expulsion...

But my sweetie came up with a perfect 

solution....a piece of marble,

cut the size of the top,

placed just so...will make this find nearly perfect.

Wonder what next weeks trash will hold?

smiles...